ACR Appraisals

 

His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity.

He is very quiet officer. He opens his mouth, only to change whichever foot was previously in there.

He has carried out each and every one of his duties to his entire
satisfaction.

He is technically sound, but socially impossible.

This Officer reminds me very much of a gyroscope- always spinning around at a frantic pace, but not really going anywhere.

This young officer has delusions of adequacy.

When he joined my ship, this Officer was something of a granny; since then he has aged considerably.

This Officer has used my ship to carry his genitals from port to port, and my officers to carry him from bar to bar.

Since my last report he has reached rock bottom, and has now started to dig.

He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.

He has the wisdom of youth, and the energy of old age.

This Officer should go far - and the sooner he starts, the better.

This Officer is depriving a town somewhere of an idiot.

The only ship I would recommend this man for is citizenship.

He works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.

Santa Singh

Fed up with people making fun of him, Santa Singh (the sardar) decided to change his religion. He joined a priest in a church as his assistant.
One day the priest was called away for an emergency. Not wanting toleave the confessional unattended, He called Santa D'Costa (his new assistant) and asked him to cover for him.

Santa told him he wouldn't know what to say, but the priest told him to stay with him for a little while and learn what todo.

Santa joined the priest and then followed him into the confessional. A few minutes later a woman came in and said "Father, forgive me for I have sinned"
Priest: "What did you do?"
Woman: " I committed adultery"
Priest: "How many times?"
Woman: "Three times"
Priest: "Say Two Hail Marys, put $ 5.00 in the charity box, and sin no more"

A few minutes later a man entered the confessional.
He said "Father,forgive me for I have sinned"
Priest: "What did you do?"
Man: "I committed adultery"
Priest: "How many times?"
Man: "Three times"
Priest: "Say two Hail Marys, put $ 5.00 in the charity box, and sin no more"

Santa, a quick learner, told the priest that he understood the job andthe priest could leave. Santa D'costa was now alone. A few minutes lateranother woman entered and said "Father, forgive me for I have sinned"
Santa: "What did you do?"
Woman: "I committed adultery"
Santa: "How many times?"
Woman: "Once"
Santa: "Go do it two more times, we have a special offer this week,three times for

$ 5.00"

 

Alone...............

Once, Johny was so upset by his past deeds that he decided to visit a church and confess all of his sins. When he arrived at the church, he walked to the confession area and spoke to the pastor, "Father, I am sinful."

"Yes son, just tell me what you have done, the lord will forgive you."

"Father, I have a steady relationship with my girlfriend, it's been for 2 years and nothing serious ever happened between us. Yesterday, I visited her house, nobody was at home except for her sister. We were alone and I slept with her."

"That's bad my boy, fortunately you have realized your mistake."

"Father, last week I went to her office to look for her, and could not find anyone except for one of her friend, as we were alone so I slept with her too."

"That's not very good of you."

"Father, before that, last month, I went to her uncle's house to look for her, nobody was around except for her auntie as we were alone, I slept with her also."

"Father.............. Father.....?" suddenly Johny realised that there was no response from the father, he walked over and discovered that the pastor was not there.

So he began searching for him.

"Father? Where are you?"

He searched all the corners, high and low and finally he found him hiding under the table behind the piano.

"Father, why are you hiding here?"

"Sorry son, suddenly I remembered there is nobody around here except me."

We Indians - "Jai Ho"

After digging to a depth of 100 meters last year, Russian scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 1000 years, and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network one thousand years ago. So, not to be outdone, in the weeks that followed, American scientists dug 200 meters and the headlines in the US papers read: 'US scientists have found traces of 2000 year old optical fibers, and have concluded that their ancestors already had advanced high-tech digital telephone 1000 years earlier than the Russians.' One week later, Indian daily newspapers reported the following: *'After digging as deep as 500 meters, Indian scientists have found absolutely nothing. They have concluded that 5000 years ago, their ancestors were already using Bluetooth and Wireless technology.* "JAI HO"

 

Glimpses into the future

 

Impact of recession?

Ha Ha Ha!

 

 

Rohit Agarwal

9868967224

http://jottingsofmine.blogspot.com

http://www.goodnewz.in

 

! PaUNa-mad: PaUNa-imad\ma pUNa-at\ pUNaa-maud\cCyato .

pUNa-sya pUrmaaVa pUNa-maovaaiSaYyato .

Absolute perfection comes from the absolute.

 

That which is well built
will never be torn down.
That which is well latched
can not slip away.
Those who do things well
will be honored from generation to generation.

(Tao Te Ching)

 

Signage