Hilarious Doordarshan Video

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Battle of the Sexes : Those Evening Classes

EVENING CLASSES FOR WOMEN

Women think they already know everything, but wait...training courses are now available for women on the following topics:

1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before

2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits

3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits

4. Man Management: Minor Household Chores Can Wait Till After The Game

5. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too

6. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His

7. Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First

8. Communication Skills II : Thinking Before Speaking

9. Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging

10. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire

11. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up

12. Introduction to Parking

13. Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space

14. Water Retention: Fact or Fat

15. Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter

16. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not for Human Consumption

17. Cooking III: How not to inflict Your Diets on Other People

18. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully

20. Dancing: Why Men Don't Like To

21. Classic Footwear: Wearing Shoes You Already Have

22. Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice

23. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together

24. Oil and Gas: Your Car Needs Both

25. TV Remotes: For Men Only




EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN

Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty of their contents, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants.

Topic1. How to fill ice-cube trays. Step by step with slide presentation.

Topic2. Lavatory paper rolls: do they grow on the holders? Round-table
discussion.

Topic 3: Differences between the laundry basket and the floor. Pictures
and explanatory graphics.

Topic 4. The after-dinner dishes and silverware: can they levitate and
fly into the kitchen sink?

   Examples on video.

Topic 5. Loss of identity: losing the remote control to your significant
other. Helpline and support groups.

Topic 6. Learning how to find things, starting with looking in the right
place instead of turning the house

   upside down while screaming. Open forum.

Topic 7. Health watch: bringing her flowers is not harmful to your
health. Graphics and audio tape.

Topic 8. Real men ask for directions when lost. Real-life testimonials.

Topic 9. Is it genetically impossible to sit quietly as she parallel
parks? Driving simulation.

Topic 10. Learning to live: basic differences between mother and
wife. Online class and role playing.

Topic 11. How to be the ideal shopping companion. Relaxation
exercises, meditation and breathing techniques.

Topic 12. How to fight cerebral atrophy: remembering
birthdays, anniversaries, other important dates and calling when you're going to be late. Cerebral shock therapy sessions and full lobotomies offered.

 

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